Holland Doc 24

Film student Sjoerd Tanghe portrayed his father, the famous Flamisch theatre director Dirk Tanghe. His documentary shows that fame and artistic success also have their dark sides: his father has an alcohol problem and every now and then he is very depressed. Sjoerd films his father during his stay in a rehabilitation clinic.

What inspires you to make documentaries?

I am always fascinated with every kind of people. I like to show them as real people. For example, I could have made a glorification of my father, about how wonderful and full of fantasy he is. Then, however, I should miss the other side of him, the tragic part. I am always looking for that balance. People have two sides, which I try to catch in my documentaries. I work with my intuition. Sometimes I have the feeling that coincidence has an important role in my work.

How was it to work with your father?

A lot of people think: "Oh! How nice! Your dad is a director! Then you must be rich! That has to be fun!" That is not true. It all seems fantastic, but when I saw my dad in his depressive periodes, frustrated by everything that has to do with theatre, that is something you do not want to experience. Dirk Tanghe is a very interesting person to make a documentary about, just because he is so complex and fascinating. But making a film as being his son, makes it even more interesting. This challenge was the reason to make the film: to show the world I can do something like making this film, to expose something about myself to a big audience.

How did the film process go?

After two and a half year film school I had to make a graduation film. Then, however, my father went again through a difficult time. We already expected it but it was getting worse. I tried to repress it but eventually it began to play a big role in my life that I couldn't think of anything else. Then I thought, if I cannot repress it, why not making a film about it? But it wasn't that easy: there was no line or structure, just an idea. In the beginning I was very emotional. When I had to present my idea I did burst into tears. But I was a hundred percent sure that as I once started I know exactly what I want.

How did people receive Me will always be me?

A lot of teachers were afraid of my father taking over the control and making a film the way he wanted. And he did come with old photos and interviews. But I told my father immediately: "Dad, it is about the presence! Not about the past!" People were also afraid of me getting to emotionally involved; that I was making some sort of therapeutic film about my father, which nobody else but me could understand. I can understand these doubts, but I knew what I wanted and I knew I could do this. Although, I was very nervous during the exam. I walked into the room and sat down in front of the jury. It was quiet. I started to get a bad feeling. Then, they told me that they had no comments and that the loved the film. After five minutes I was standing outside again. That was a wonderful feeling!

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